Growing and Aging

Growing into this space of being “A Certain Age” is not quite what I expected. To be honest, I am not sure what I expected. There is more to growing and aging than I remember hearing from older women when I was younger.
 
In my youth I had a mental checklist of what I thought I would and would not accept in a companion. I wanted someone who had never been married…no children…he should have ambition and all his own teeth. Now, after spending many weekends at home alone watching my children go off with their friends…well, let’s just say I’ve made some adjustments to that mental list.

Now I am interested in a guy that could actually choose his own meal from a restaurant menu without any help, feed himself, be involved in the lives of his children and be supportive and encouraging to them. He should also be someone who recognizes the value of a good dental plan. Oh…just one more thing. This may sound unnecessary to you, but I would hope he’s also able to bend over and tie his own shoes. At some point I discovered I could be a piece of work by myself, so I can at least offer room for others who may be in the same position.

Being spontaneous has also taken on new meaning for me. I believe I have always had a bold, adventurous spirit, but aging can cause a slight shift. The random thoughts and impulses that were made during my youth are now weighed with words and phrases like…good judgment…reasonable…and realistic. Perhaps it is the circumstances and experiences that we’ve managed to survive that eased those words into my vocabulary.

How did it change? When did it change? Why does it have to be different? Is this the shift that comes with growing older? Maybe it is realizing we are the adults in the room and others will defer to us to make the sane and rational decisions. Why must we allow age, or responsibility, or reason, or logic to define us in a way that rubs against the very grain of our creative, energetic, “refuse to be labeled souls”?

We may have to take more medication than we prefer… have something in our wardrobe with elastic or the word orthopedic in it…and realize the sexy panties that we like are not as comfortable as they use to be, but we can reclaim our spirits and souls in different ways.
Let’s make ourselves the special occasion as often as possible… choose our personal indulgences without feeling guilty and know a good bottle of wine and pate should be enjoyed when the spirit moves you, not just when company is coming.
In spite of the unsolicited changes in ourselves, and our lives we can still laugh and love deeply.                 I stand “In Waiting”, and always… Expecting the Extraordinary!